I love how life surprises me. But I didn’t always. Sure, as kids our lives are so out of our control that everyday is a surprise. Hop in the car, we’re going to the grocery store. Hop in the car, we’re going to Canada! I loved all that, and that was all I knew.
Later, as teens, we are encouraged to plan. Most teens claw and scratch their way towards full control. What are you doing after high school? (Asked during sophomore year.) If college, what major? (Asked before standardized tests.) What are you going to wear to prom? (Asked in January of senior year.) When are you going to have children? (Asked at high school graduation and every family occasion thereafter.)
I got solidly on board with the whole planning for my future shift and had very specific answers. I would go to college to become a writer. I would wear white eyelet. I was going to marry my high school sweetheart and have children as soon as I could. But after battling a few brutal curves, I grieved all of these dreams (except for my prom outfit). Unplanned surprises derailed all of my perfect plans.
After awhile I looked gently around and developed new outlooks that brought me happiness. Keeping my day to day very simple. Noticing connections that I wouldn’t have imagined could lead to love. Surprises--sometimes sometimes resembling an old dreams in new forms--made me laugh with joy at these ironic winks from the universe.
Many years have passed. I now love finding myself in life contexts I didn’t plan on experiencing but which delight me to my spiritual core. (Although, when I actually travel, I love to research possible destinations endlessly from my armchair. I get two trips for one that way and still manage to get lost on my travels now and then.)
Like every teen and beyond, I imagined myself as a rock and roll star but I have no talent for staying in key. Now I am learning to play the harp which sings itself and there is live music in my house.
There was a time way back that I thought I heard Hollywood calling, though I was really too shy to answer. But my son Brennan put me in a movie of his last November and it was an honor to see him work and everyone behind the scenes.
I thought I would like to work for a non-profit. My daughter started one and asked me to be on the board of directors. My learning curve is more lovingly supported than it would be anywhere else.
I discovered a spiritual path I had never heard of--but recognized in my heart and knew was right for me.
I have had artwork featured at the Minneapolis Institute of Art for four years in a row. A few friends and I create a floral arrangement which echoes a museum work of art by which it is displayed for four days (along with about 150 other floral arrangements) during Art in Bloom--an event which attracts over 35,000 visitors each year. Me, in a museum!
And now See Double. I am finally in the publishing business and writing a blog (inspired by Sarah) With my husband. Surprise!